Wedding is like restarting your life with a new identity and new people. The stress factor (or better still, uncertainty) is then considered a given. What can we do at such times to allay our fears or manage the stress specially related to new family. Here we are providing you certain guidelines that may help to make your journey bit more comfortable . Keep these things in your mind The 7 most important conversations you must have with your husband before your wedding.
This is most important point to consider. You along with your partner should work as team. And its totally unfair to put your partner in situation where he or she has choose between him or her family, even if you feels like your in laws are on your nerve, remember one thing as long as you are with your partner you are with them too. Therefore it is advisable to work as a team. Your partner is your shield try to win his trust because he or she is the one who knows your in laws more than any other person on this earth. 11 Things you should Demand from your Partner without Hesitation in Relationship.
Be who you are, you don’t need to make yourself into the perfect daughter-in-law. You don’t need to try to be Super daughter in-laws. Don’t try to be something you’re not just because you think it will please your in-laws, even if they make no bones about excepting you to be someone you’re not, you do not have to do that. 10 things your husband wants to hear from you. Do whatever you like to do whether to be a home maker, or working women or CEO of any company be like that, remember one thing your husband like the way you are don’t change, the in laws will learn to accept it later or sooner.
Never criticize your spouse in front of their parents
Try to avoid this that you should never criticize your spouse in front of their parents, you may have some issues with your spouse habits or behaviour but try not to overly criticize in front of in- laws it may can increase the complications and no parents like this. Be committed to each other Commitments you must take with your partner.
Set clear boundaries very politely
There is a saying “Good fences make good neighbours” yes you heard it right your in laws need to be your neighbours and you need to put fences in some to your matters. And try to make it as soon as possible before it become their habit and you end up creating a real mess blowing up at your worse. A calm and reasonable discussion will go a lot farther than any mad confrontations.
Try to be flexible
Sometimes you have to agree to disagree. Sometimes you have to do things that will make your partner and your in-laws happy. Sometimes they have to do things that will make you happy. Compromise is an important part of any relationship, but it’s especially important where your in-laws are concerned. Taking one of the team is never a bad thing, but by no means should the compromising always be one sided. Learn How to be happy in long a distance relationship.
Hold your tongue
Sometimes telling the whole truth can be unnecessarily hurtful. We are not saying that you should start telling lies but sometimes we have to manipulate our sentences so that it won’t hurt anybody. For example if you have any baby and you don’t want to leave him with elderly old grandparents, get a baby sitter and if the in laws persists about it say something pleasant like “I really appreciate all your offers of help, but having a sitter who knows the routine is a lot easier for me, and I’m so frazzled at the moment, I just need to do the easiest thing I can.” Then let it go. Be a happy couple How to be a Happy Couple: 10 Habits That Make a Difference.
Avoid comparison and competition
Yes you heard it right, if really want to live a happy life don’t dare to make comparison with your in laws. You have a very different place in your spouse life and its totally unfair to make any comparisons. Yes at sometimes you can get a feeling of competition from your mother in law when it come to their son, she sometimes be a little competitive, try to avoid it don’t take on heart because she is mother it will take some time for her to understand that a you are also a very important part of her son’s and share equal love.
Admit your mistakes
Yes admit when you are wrong and I am sure they will forgive. When you feel you were wrong don’t try to prove your self right every time admit your mistake honestly. Try to think from their prospective and we all know it takes lots of courage to admit our mistakes. Try to bend down .
Try to remain calm during the discussions
Sometimes, you just have to let yourself cool off so you can stay calm. It’s important to be as mature as possible when dealing with in-law issues, and completely losing your stuff is not going to help you to reach that level of maturity. If you have to take some time to cool down, go right a head, be better in the long run.
Keep the communication channel open
Good communication is the key of every healthy relationship and you should need to do it directly. Don’t play passing game involving your spouse to communicate on your behalf take the charge and communicate face to face whatever you like but again be selective with your language, choose your tone very properly. It’s easy for misunderstandings to take place when you try to play a game of Telephone like that, and the resulting messages can make a bad situation even worse.
Take a note The inevitable changes that you have to face We hope these points will help you to enjoy your married life to its fullest and help you to make strong bond with your in laws.